Get Busy, Gal!!

So, here I am, a stay-at-home mom (SAHM). I NEVER in a million years thought that I would miss working yet when I first became a SAHM in 2007, I was amazed at the adjustment period that occurred. I never really realized how much my job identified me. I guess that makes sense since we spend so many hours of our day working but I never anticipated such a strong feeling of being without identity. Also, I've always been the social butterfly - in grade school, high school and of course, the workplace. Staying at home, I truly missed human contact with other adults and this was yet another adjustment.

Don't get me wrong, I knew that what I was doing at home as a mom was extremely important and given the choice, I wouldn't have it any other way. Yet, nonetheless, I had to redefine myself....and this also came on the heels of no longer being a primary caretaker for my mom, who passed away only 18 days before we left for Russia to bring Madeline home. I was no longer AMY: wife, teacher, daughter, caregiver but, I was now AMY: wife, mom and ????? Although I loved staying home and being a mom, as David began traveling more for work I found myself becoming extremely stir-crazy. So, I found that in order prevent myself from going crazy and to try to allow for myself to be a better mom and wife, I had to do things that fostered my own self-development and feeling of worth. (Yes, I know, being a mom is one of the most worthwhile things yet, it is a thankless job :-)

So where am I now in 2010? Since becoming a SAHM I have learned to force myself to break away from things and occasionally take time for myself. Although life gets busy, David and I have learned that date nights are essential! And, although life gets busy I still try to make a date with friends for a bite to eat or a cocktail. I occasionally splurge and indulge in pampering such as a pedicure. I have also tried to find activities that would be rewarding for me. I have tried to find opportunities (for me AND Madeline) to socialize during the day by joining and becoming Treasurer of our local MOMS Club (New Years Resolution is to be more consistent with my participation in this club). I am the room mom for Madeline's Pre-K class. I have taken on coordinating alumni events for the former grade school/Catholic church of the neighborhood that I grew up in. The alumni group is not just for my class but all grades and the events benefit the non-for-profit organization that is currently housed on the campus of the old school.....oh, by the way, they asked if I would be interested in serving on their board. I also, have a phone call in to inquire about being a reading volunteer for a reading radio (for the blind) Wheewwwww......

So, here I sit, Madeline had school this morning. What did I accomplish around the house? No, no cleaning....not stripping wallpaper.....not sorting and unpacking the stack of boxes that are STILL in my basement from our move.....not laundry.....not cooking....not balancing checkbooks....not working on the home decorating that needs to be done. Nope, I worked on Alumni Event stuff. Don't get me wrong....I am not complaining but I have to stop being so hard on myself! I have to remember that when I am working on my other projects, I am still being productive - even though I might not have worked on things that need to be done around the house. Yet, unlike when I first became a SAHM, I once again feel as though I am doing something with my spare time....but that leaves me with little spare time (thus the lack of regular blog posts). My calendar is often booked up and the hours in any given day are limited....but I have figured out a way to be a stay-at-home mom and also fill the void that not working left in my social life and self-development.