Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Self-Confidence Killer

So, yesterday was the "Killer Cow", today is the "Self-Confidence Killer". I've *always* had body image issues. I guess you could say I now have reason to but I did have these "issues" even when I was 15-20 years younger and 20-30 pounds lighter. But any temporary boost in self-confidence was pretty much killed today.....

Recently, we've returned from a family vacation (MCOXXI). During the time away, we spent a fair amount of time on the beach. While on the beach and outfitted in my "mom suit", I looked around at other women wearing 2 piece bathing suits and compared my body shape to theirs. (NEWSFLASH to male readers.....ALL WOMEN DO THIS ALL THE TIME!!) I thought to myself, "That woman is fatter than me and *she* is wearing a two piece and doesn't look *that* terrible....maybe I could." or "She is about the same size as me and looks decent....maybe I could do it." Today, Madeline and I headed out for marathon shopping and inevitably we ended up looking at the swimsuits which are now on clearance (of course we *HAD TO* add to our swimsuit wardrobe....our new house will have a pool and hot tub!......the suits were 70% off at JCPenney's!)

So, here we go....the confidence killer.... I tried on a two-piece bathing suit. As far as two piece goes I thought the suit was somewhat passable if worn after sunset in a very shady area when the moon isn't shining. What did Madeline say as she looked at me in the dressing room?? Madeline LOUDLY exclaimed, "MAMA! Pull your shirt down!!!" Oh no, Madeline didn't stop there....she continued to chant this to me until she literally started crying!!! Was I *THAT* scary?!?!?!?!

Long story, but I did end up purchasing the suit as a result of David's encouragement......yet, David's suit opinion does not hold much credibility in the endorsement area as he would tell me that I looked good in a bikini even if I were 300 pounds. I decided to purchase the suit for the dark of the night when no one but David is around (wouldn't have the guts otherwise). Now wish me luck in the weight department....keep in mind I don't believe in exercise! Anyone have a suggestion for a potato chip/cookie weight loss diet??


Kelly said...

I think I almost just wet my pants!! that is hilarious! as for EXERCISE, you are moving into a development, put Madeline in a stroller and get walking!! after dinner, first thing in the am, but start walking! you know exercise is NOT a 4 letter word, you can do it.

Amy said...

Kelly.....I NEEEEEEEEDDDD YOUUUUUU!!!! Force me, girl!

Marty said...

Out of the mouths of babes!

Hey, Amy, like I said earlier, you're quite the cougarette.

BTW, I exercise furiously (I actually enjoy it), and despite that am about 10 lbs overweight (the Mazur curse of ignoring portion sizes of everything, food and drink). Though in the past I never had "image issues", I find that I am no longer as quick to whip my shirt off on a hot day, particularly when I'm out running on campus with women half my age. I don't want to put them off their feed with my wrinkles and gray chest hairs.

Amy said...

Between Marty and Kelly (both runners) maybe the you can get me motivated to move my butt.

Marty, as far as "cougar" goes....at the rate I am going I will soon classify in the hippos category if I don't do something soon!